For Freshmen. By Freshmen.
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Dec 13 2015
by Taylor Laroche

'Twas the Night Before Finals

By Taylor Laroche - Dec 13 2015

'Twas the night before finals, when all through the dorms

Not a student was sleeping, they were studying till morn;

The flashcards were strewn 'cross the desks without care,

The students were crying, and tearing their hair;

The teachers were nestled all snug in their beds;

While visions of test grades danced in their heads;

And even though I knew that it was a trap,

I just settled my brains for a short little nap,

When out of my phone there arose such a clatter,

I sprang from my desk to see what was the matter.

Away to the phone I flew with a shock,

Clicked on the home screen and slid open the lock.

The drool on the desk had stuck papers to my cheek,

I tried to tear them away but I was just too weak,

When what to my wondering eyes did appear,

But a miniature picture distorted by a drool smear,

With a shake I quickly woke my roommate,

I knew in a moment it was our RA.

More rapid than eagles his voice it came,

And he whistled, and shouted, and called us by name:

"Now, Taylor! now, Jackie! now Danielle and Katelyn!

Get up! It's time to test! Your teachers aren't waitin'!

Out of your beds! Out to the hall!

Now dash away! dash away! dash away all!"

And before we could even bat an eye,

Gone was his voice, without a goodbye;

So out of our rooms, to the hall we flew

With disheveled clothes, and bleary eyes too—

And then, in a twinkling, we heard outside the door

The groaning and moaning of everyone on the floor.

As they poked out their heads, and were coming around,

Out his door our RA came with a bound.

He was dressed all in red, from his head to his foot,

And his clothes were all tarnished with flour and soot;

A book bag of goodies he had flung on his back,

And he looked like a middle schooler just opening his pack.

His eyes—how they twinkled! his dimples, how merry!

His cheeks were like roses, his nose like a cherry!

His droll little mouth was drawn up like a bow,

And my suspicion of him continued to grow;

The stump of a pencil he held tight in his teeth,

And the shavings, they encircled his feet like a wreath;

He wouldn't answer our questions or even say hello

Then out of his bag, he pulled a bowl full of jello.

He was laughing so hard as he pulled out the treats,

Exhausted and confused, we started to weep;

A wink of his eye and a twist of his head

Soon gave us to know we had nothing to dread;

"It is not time to test," he said with a smirk,

And as he filled all our pockets; we called him a jerk,

And laying his finger aside of his nose,

And giving a nod, he struck a strange pose;

He told us to relax, that we'd done all we could,

We were going to do fine, he knew that we would.

And we heard him exclaim, ere he slid out of sight—

“Happy finals to all, and to all a good night!”

Lead Image: Pinterest

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Taylor Laroche - Columbia College Chicago

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