2. So are you, like, from the Jersey Shore?
...Just no. Unless you do live by the shore. Then perhaps yes.
3. Is the “Jersey Shore” accurate?
Well considering all but one of the cast members were actually from Staten Island, NY...I'm gonna say no.
4. Wow, you don't have an accent!
Uh, thank you, I think?
5. What exit?
Please stop. Some people, like myself, don't even live close enough to the Parkway to bother using it.
6. So can you just not afford to live in NYC?
I won't even comment on this one.
7. What do you even do there?
...the same things every bored kid in suburbia does?
8. Are you Italian? (Bonus follow up: Is your family in the mob?)
Oh right, I forgot to tell you James Gandolfini (RIP) is my dad.
9. Doesn’t it smell terrible?
I mean yeah the NJ Turnpike is awful, but it’s because of the factories that we can’t exactly get rid of, unfortunately.
10. I bet you don’t know how to pump gas.
I mean I have left the state so... yes I do?
11. Diners aren’t even that good.
A. Yes they are. B. We also have Wawa.
Lead image credit: Ipwines via Flicker