College life is rough. Between in-depth assignments, hectic social scenes, and keeping yourself sane, there lies one extra pressure: relationships.
Everyone seems to be coupled up. You see them going out into town on cute dates, studying in the library together, cuddling in tiny dorm beds, all over Instagram smooching. As a freshman, you're catapulted into a completely new environment with all new people, and it can get pretty lonely. Especially if couples are everywhere you look on campus. This brand new experience and exciting chapter in your life would be even better if it were shared with somebody right?
You don't need a boyfriend or a girlfriend to make your freshman year as spectacular as you imagined it.
Being single during your first year means you truly have freedom. College is the first time you’re out on your own, away from family or friends. It’s a lot of responsibility to decide how to discipline yourself. No matter how many beautiful love stories you hear, they all involve compromise. For the sake of love, you might have to sit through that 3-hour long science fiction movie your boyfriend loves so dearly. You might have to be dragged through every section of Victoria’s Secret by your girlfriend in search of the perfect bra. You might have to eat at the dining hall that doesn’t have cookies because your significant other wants to eat at the one that has stir-fry. You might have to do things you don’t want to do. Yeah, sure, it may be worth it if it makes the person you’re dating happy. But since college is the first time that everything is really about you, why compromise that privilege?
Take advantage of the freedom! Stay up late studying, watching Friends or raging at a frat party – no one will be on the sidelines, waiting on you or expecting anything out of you. No one will be pressuring you to do things you don’t feel comfortable doing, whether they be in a social setting or an intimate setting. The idea of no one being there could seem scary, but if you do want that circle of comfort around you, friends can be a great substitute.
Sure, your friends may not kiss you or spoon you after a hard day of classes, but they can provide support and companionship the same way a boyfriend or girlfriend could. College is known for being a time of exploration. Instead of exploring the quad for your future husband or wife, explore who you are, your interests, and your desires, aspirational or sexual.
Basically – your freshman year of college is one of the only times in your life you get to be truly selfish.
Allow yourself to be positively selfish and immerse yourself in the experience you dreamt college would be, with no one holding you back.
Once you know yourself you can get to know others a lot better.
The search for one true love can wait until sophomore year. I promise.