While entering what I considered the brick jail cell that was my high school for the first time, I already knew the relationship was going to be a rocky one. I immediately felt trapped. Like I didn’t belong.
I held this cynical lens to every part of it: the people, the subjects and the school itself. I felt as if it was completely unnecessary, partly due to my desire to become an actress. I had a plan. Move out to L.A. after high school, audition for a big movie, book it and BAM my career is set. I know this sounds ridiculous, but to my 14-year-old mind it made perfect sense.
Due to this career choice I made for myself, I believed high school was unimportant. My grades were despicable, and I just didn’t care. When the teacher would pass back tests and I’d see a 50% hit the desk, I laughed. I also rarely showed up to the place, my absences were so high I’d receive truancy notes in the mail.
This way of thinking continued all the way to sophomore year. My parents were worried. Even my brothers would say to me, “Georgia, I regret not doing well. You should really try,” and I’d laugh in their faces. At this time, I felt as if I knew what I was doing, and nobody saw my grand plan the way I did.
Something changed junior year. I began to form a real interest in college and actually put effort into my grades. Receiving a good grade on something was a feeling I never really had, but once I felt it, I kept going. To put effort into something and ultimately doing well because of this effort was so worth it. I still had my dreams of becoming an actress, but I knew college had to come first.
Later, when I began applying to colleges, I became aware of my lackluster GPA, and then realized I probably wouldn’t get into the colleges I had dreams of being in. This was hard for me because I knew I was capable of getting into these schools, but my grades from my first two years brought me down immensely.
Before I knew it, graduation was right around the corner. When I looked back at my high school experience, well, it kind of sucked. But I know this was because of my mindset. You are in control of your feelings.
I wasted four years of high school being negative and upset. To be honest, I’d like to go back to my 14-year-old self, grab her by the shoulders and say, “Please try! I know it may seem like you have bigger and better things to be doing, and you can definitely do those things." High school is still an experience I wish I had appreciated.
If you're like me, please remember high school is four years of your life. Don’t waste it! Even if you're pretty set on not going to college at this time, you may change your mind in the future. Also, I know people can be annoying in high school but get the work done, study and I swear you won’t regret it. Try to make the best of your experience. I know I wish I did.
I’m currently a student at Marymount Manhattan College and have almost finished my first semester. I can honestly say I loved my college from the first time I toured and still love it now. My mindset has completely altered and my attitude has changed for the better. I no longer wake up and dread my day. School has become something positive for me, and to be honest I never thought that would happen. College has given me the opportunity to be an individual and it has led me to gain confidence I never thought I'd have. It just goes to show mindsets can change and you won’t be the same person you were a year, month or even a day ago.
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