Love makes us crazy. But, being able to share that craziness with our significant other is what makes it all work. Now, you're both deciding what college is best for you, and you end up picking different schools. It settles in that you won’t be seeing each other every day anymore. However, you don’t really feel it until you're actually at school. To stay in the healthy relationship that you both had while at home together, here are some do’s and don’ts to keep in mind:
1. Do: Trust Them
Relationships are built on trust. While it is true that you won’t know every experience they have at school, whether it be socially or academically, you have to trust that they’re respecting your relationship. Worrying about what they could possibly be doing will only hurt you and your relationship.
2. Don’t: Make Accusations
Don’t make your significant other feel like they’re being interrogated or attacked. Communication is key and transparency is vital. If there is something bothering you, then call your significant other, maybe even FaceTime them. We live in the age of technology, so take advantage of that to have real meaningful conversations when you cant speak to them face-to-face.
3. Do: Visit Them
It's always good to get off campus for a little bit. Make the trip and visit your significant other, not too frequently, but just the right amount as to keep that spark in the relationship. This will allow you to meet their new friends, and more importantly, get some real time together. It can be a long time until you're both home. Texting, FaceTime and phone calls are great and all, but there is nothing like face-to-face quality time
4. Don’t: Spend Too Much Time on the Phone
Your time at college is short. Don’t spend too much of it engrossed by your phone. Look around you and spend time with your new friends and environment. There needs to be a good balance of significant other time, and real-life time. Balance is key to maintaining a healthy relationship because if you end up with your significant other too often, other aspects of your life will suffer from it.
5. Do: Be Transparent
As stated before, transparency is key. Don’t hide anything, or even lie. Aside from it being disrespectful to your partner, it will catch up with you. Having your significant other know the important parts of your life, or even day, week or month, is a significant aspect of any relationship so it shouldn’t change just because you don’t see them every day.
6) Don’t: Overthink
Do not overanalyze. Take things the way they are. If your significant other doesn’t answer right away, they could be sleeping, showering or even studying. Just because you don’t know their every step, doesn’t mean they are losing interest or that the distance is hurting the relationship. Space is not always a bad thing. Take situations as they are and breathe. You’ll only be stressing yourself out.
Ultimately, it is important to keep your relationship the way it was before college. Of course, people are dynamic and nothing will always stay the same, but you want to make sure the relationship is still giving you more happiness than sadness. Remember to always take a deep breath and keep calm.
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